My boyfriend/girlfriend prefers his friends to me: what can I do?


by Vanessa Charles


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Although it may be hard to hear, it's possible that your boyfriend or girlfriend prefers his or her friends to you. There are a number of reasons for this, and a number of ways to deal with it. It's important to take action if you realize that your partner spends more time with friends than with you. If you don't, it's likely to drive you apart and damage your relationship.

Why does my boyfriend/girlfriend prefer his friends to me?

Have you ever had the feeling that your boyfriend/girlfriend prefers his friends to you? If so, you're not alone. It happens a lot in relationships. There are several possible reasons why your partner might prefer his or her friends to you.

Friends influence your relationship 

It is important to remember that friends have been there even before you got together. It is therefore normal that your partner has a strong bond with them.

The first thing to do is to communicate with your partner. Talk to him/her about how you feel and ask how he/she feels about it. It's important to remember that theeople are not always aware of how they treat others.. If your partner doesn't realize how bad you feel He/she may not know what to do about it.

Tips for creating more balance 

There are some things you can do to try to create more balance in your relationship. For example, you can try to :

  • plan activities together
  • find common interests
  • spend more time alone with your partner doing activities you both enjoy.

Just because he/she spends time with friends doesn't mean he/she doesn't care about you. People have need a certain balance in their lives and it is normal they need to spend time with their friends.

You may also be interested in Why is my boyfriend not sociable with others?


Is it just an impression or a reality?

It's often hard to know whether our boyfriend or girlfriend prefers his or her friends to us. Is it just a feeling or a reality? There are a few telltale signs that can help us see things more clearly: 

  • If your boyfriend or girlfriend spends more time with friends than with youIt's probably a sign that they prefer them.
  • If your boyfriend or girlfriend never tells you about his friends or introduces you to them, it's probably because he or she doesn't want you to be part of his or her circle of friends.  
  • If your boyfriend or girlfriend always seems to take the advice of friends rather than your ownIt may also be a sign that they prefer them to you.

If you notice one or more of these signs it's likely that your boyfriend or girlfriend prefers his or her friends to you.

It may be that it is just an impression and your boyfriend or girlfriend simply wants to keep his or her friendships separate from his or her love life.
But it may also be a reality and that your boyfriend or girlfriend actually has difficulty choosing between friendships and romantic relationships.


Should you choose between your friends or your boyfriend/girlfriend?

It's always difficult to manage relationships between friends and boyfriends/girlfriends. There's a choice to be made between the two, and it's not always easy to know what to do. If your boyfriend/girlfriend prefers his friends to you, there are some things you can do to try and solve the problem.


It is important to communicate with your boyfriend/girlfriend. Talk about how you feel and try to find common ground for you to spend of the time between you

Differentiating between friends and boyfriends

Friends can be a important part of someone's lifeBut they shouldn't be the only thing that counts. If your boyfriend/girlfriend spends more time with his or her friends than with you, it's time to let him know that you need more attention.

Jealousy: a bad habit...

Don't be jealous of your boyfriend/girlfriend's friends. Jealousy can be a normal feeling, but it can also be very dangerous. destructive, especially in a couple.


Should I tell him that it pains me that he spends more time with his friends than with me?

When you're in a relationship, it's normal to want to spend as much time with your partner as possible. However, it's also normal for each of us to need to do things outside the couple and maintain our circle of friends.

If your boyfriend or girlfriend spends more time with their friends than with you, it doesn't necessarily mean he or she loves you any less.

It is important to respect each other's personal space and don't be too possessive. If you're worried or sad about the situation, it's a good idea to possible to talk about it calmly with your partner to express your feelings.


What should I do if my boyfriend/girlfriend prefers his friends to me?

It's important to take a step back and not try to change your boyfriend/girlfriend. If you're in a relationship, that means you're a good match, but it doesn't mean you have to spend all your time together. It's normal for everyone to have their own space and activities.

How do you reconcile love and friendship?

Reconciling love and friendship requires open communication and respect for each other's needs. It's important to spend quality time with your friends and partner, while setting clear boundaries. Encouraging relationships between them can help create a harmonious balance.

What should I do if my boyfriend/girlfriend tells me he/she prefers his/her friends to me?

If your boyfriend/girlfriend tells you that he/she prefers his/her friends, it is important not to take this personally. Just because he/she likes his/her friends better does not mean that you are not important to him/her. You can try asking him/her what he/she likes about his/her friends and what he/she would like you to do to be closer to him/her.

How can I get my boyfriend/girlfriend to spend more time with me?

You can try suggesting activities that interest you both, or organizing group outings with your respective friends. It's important not to force your boyfriend/girlfriend to spend time with you, as this can have the opposite effect and he/she may avoid you even more.

What happens if my boyfriend/girlfriend refuses to spend time with me?

If your boyfriend/girlfriend is adamant about not spending time with you, there may be a deeper problem. He/she may not be happy with the relationship and may be looking to end the relationship. In this case, it is important to talk openly about it to see what is wrong and try to find a solution together.

Vanessa Charles

A (very) close friend of Cupid and a true lover of relationships of all kinds, I am the main editor of Give Me Date. I answer your questions about couples, sexuality and dating and I test dating sites to give you a subjective opinion on how to find love or meet new people.

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